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Anti-bullying class taught through mixed martial arts

Written by
Andrew Scherer

St. Peters, MO (KSDK) – Bullying among children and teens is being called an epidemic by some. President Obama, even released an anti-bullying message after several suicides among youths were reported last fall.

A world champion fighter from St. Charles County is trying to kick this problem. Jermaine Andre runs Andre’s MMA Academy in St. Peters.

“MMA” stands for mixed martial arts. You’ve probably seen those cage match fights on TV featuring two people using all sorts of different techniques like hand to hand combat, kicking and other moves.

Despite the violent nature of the sport, Andre says it’s the perfect sport to curb bullying.

One of his students, Travis Callahan, 13, says there was a time he used his size to bully others in school.

“I had a little group, we go around picking on other kids,” said Callahan.

But that’s in the past, now he’s a teen with manners.

Alex Dobson says there was a time when he was bullied in school, a kid with low self esteem. But now, he’s a confident person.

He has just made a 180, he’s going down the right road,” said Dobson’s mom. She adds Alex has drastically changed since she enrolled him in the classes.

Andre says the anti bullying message doesn’t come in the fighting, rather the training.

“We teach you how to protect yourself, we teach you how to stay calm, teach you how to think correctly, teach you how to be respectful,” said Andre.

He’s combining those teachings into a two hour anti-bullying class for kids ages five to 12.

“I’m here to teach you on how to not be bullied and how to not become a bully,” added Andre.

He designed the program with help from a panel comprised of parents, an MMA fighter and a police officer. The two hour class talks about reporting bullying behavior to an adult and avoiding confrontations. The kids meditate and learn self defense techniques.

“I’m not teaching kids to hit and hurt, but I am teaching them if someone grabs them in a chokehold how to get lose,” said Andre.

He promotes his class does two things: builds confidence and gives the kids a sense of belonging to a group where they’re respected. He also doesn’t want to know if the kids in his class are bullies or the one’s being bullied because he says that gives them a label.

“The guy who is the bully, we can still save him, ‘look man, you have all this strength and all this power, you should be leading and helping people instead of trying to hurt and destroy people. You can be somebody, you mean I can be somebody, yeah, and now we are going to show you how,” said Andre.


Schoolboy, 13: bullies are driving me to suicide

Dad tells of fears for son,12

A SCHOOLBOY says he is being driven to suicide by cruel bullies’ sadistic attacks.

Stewart Collins, 12, was held down by four other pupi s and had his ears rubbed with sandpaper until they bled in one assault.

And at a crisis meeting with senior teachers, Stewart told them he is suicidal because of the campaign of hate, fuelled in part because he is originally from England.

Stewart Collins has been subjected to cruel taunts at Caldervale High in Airdrie, Lanarkshire, for months.
But his tormentors have stepped up their campaign with physical attacks.

And Stewart has begun to self-harm, hitting his head off walls and scratching himself because he is so traumatised by what has been happening and what he fears will happen in the future.

Now his desperate mum Sara, 43, and stepdad Robert Warren, 45, have taken him out of school.

Last Monday, Sheff ieldborn Stewart, who moved to Scotland with his family four years ago, was targeted as he walked home near a road.

He was pushed to the ground and had his satchel thrown in front of a car.

Stewart said last night: “I told the teachers I don’t trust them because they say they will get it to stop but it never does.

“I can’t sleep at night because I don’t know what is going to happen next.”

Robert said the school had refused to get involved in Monday’s attack because it did not happen at school.

He said: “Stewart is called an English b*****d and ridiculed at every turn.

“And we don’t know the full extent of it. It just can’t go on.”

Robert said two boys and two girls have been bullying Stewart but his request for them to be removed had been rejected.

He added:”If they won’t remove the bullies then they will need to supply a tutor.”

North Lanarkshire Council said: “We are aware of this case and are in discussion with the family.”


Many bullies are social climbers, study says

UNIVERSITY STUDY
BY ELIZABETH GIBSON

The TV show Glee might be a bit overdramatic in the way it depicts more-popular high-school students’ tossing slushies at glee-club members, but it has the general right idea.

Bullying has a lot to do with popularity, according a new study by the University of California at Davis.

The study suggests that bullying largely is motivated by a desire to climb the social ladder, as opposed to trying to compensate for trouble at home or other personal problems, as many assume.

“This is not to say that both things aren’t happening at once,” said Robert E. Faris, one of the study’s authors and an assistant sociology professor at UC. “But by and large, our study found that it was about social status, even more than demographics or socioeconomics.”

Other studies have estimated that bullying hurts as many as 5.7 million children in the U.S. each year.

A small percentage of popular kids at the very top of the social hierarchy tend to be less aggressive, probably because they’ve reached the top and have no need to bully, Faris’ study says. But other than that, the more popular students become, the more they act out. Boys were more prone to physical bullying than girls, who leaned more toward passive-aggressive acts and needling comments.

Those at the bottom of the food chain were less likely to bully, partly because they lack the clout with their fellow students to get away with it.

The study looked at 4,000 high-school students in North Carolina, mapping their relationships and bullying habits. Overall, most students weren’t aggressive.

Jim Bisenius, a bullying expert based in Pickerington, said the study might be an oversimplification, but it matches what he has seen in interviews with bullies and their victims. Bisenius runs Bully-Proofing Youth, which provides training to prevent bullying.

There are three types of bullies in his experience: spoiled children without a sense of limitations; neglected children who lash out for attention; and high-pressure achievers set on climbing the social ladder.

Social climbers are different from truly popular teenagers because they rely on control, intimidation and politics instead of genuine likability, Bisenius said. Girls will sometimes use fear of exclusion from the group to keep “followers” in line, and they’ll systematically break up friendships that threaten their authority.

“These kids think strategically like little chess players,” he said. “Their bullying is still based on insecurity, but it’s much more planned and plotted than I would ever have thought initially.”

Psychologists used to think that bullies tended to be children with poor social skills, but increasingly they’re realizing that the stereotypical image of a bulky kid stealing lunch money is outdated, said Kisha Radliff, an assistant professor of school psychology at Ohio State University.

Radliff said a lot of bullies are students who do well in school and seem sweet – when teacher isn’t looking.

The UC study is important, she said, because it gets the word out that there’s more than one factor in bullying.

If bullying is a matter of power, Faris said, he hopes adults will find ways to discourage students from letting aggression dictate a classmate’s status.


Child Sense: Identifying if your child is being bullied

By PRISCILLA J. DUNSTAN
McClatchy-Tribune

Understanding what dominant sense your child is will make it easier to understand when they are being bullied and how to understand the signs. Being aware of behavioral exaggerations of their dominant sense, which may be different from your own, will help you gauge whether parental intervention is necessary, and what is manageable social interaction.

Tactile children will be most sensitive to physical bullying. They will be most upset by the pushes, shoves, the knocking of books out of one’s hands. They will feel helpless by their inability to fight back, and the injustice of the breaking of rules and their inability to leave the school environment. You may find that they will be more physical when they get home, fluctuating between throwing their school bag around and slamming doors; to wanting to cuddle while watching TV.

They will require more physical closeness from mom and dad, perhaps by wanting to do their homework next to you or asking you to take them to school. They may be resistant to wanting to be outside, although often by doing a physical activity together, you as the parent will be able to help them process the events more clearly.

Visual children will be most sensitive to the public nature of bullying. If it happens when other children are watching, or hearing what’s being said, the visual child will worry that others will believe it. They will be stung by comments about on appearance, weight, or the clothes they wear. You may find your child complaining about their nose, refusing to eat or dramatically changing the way they dress or style their hair. Since so much of their identity is tied up with how they look to others, it’s important to support them with changes to clothes, hair, etc. Make it clear that these changes are merely an artistic expression that will continue to change over time, and not a reflection on the good person they are underneath.

Taste and smell children will be completely overwhelmed by the intent of the bully. It is inconceivable to a taste and smell child that someone would intentionally set out to say or do something to hurt another’s feelings. They will try to rationalize the bully’s feelings, and become immersed and unable to concentrate on anything other than “why?” This obsessive thought process is the taste and smell child’s way of coping, so describing situations where you may have gone through a similar thing will be helpful. Unfortunately, all the intellectual understanding in the world won’t help stop some people from being nasty, and this is a lesson the taste and smell child will just have to learn.

Auditory children will be most affected by nasty comments, taunts, name-calling and, of course, tone. Being called a nasty name is far more upsetting to an auditory child than a shove in the corridor. The “sticks and stones will break my bones, but names will never hurt me” rhyme does not apply to an auditory child for them, words cause real pain.

An auditory child will need to repeatedly talk out what was said by the bully, in order to comprehend it. The fortunate thing is that you will know about the bullying, because they will tell you about it, over and over. Be aware that sometimes, simply telling the auditory child that he said the right thing is all that’s needed to feel better.


Depression May Tie Bullying to Substance Use in Girls

By Rick Nauert PhD Senior News Editor

Researchers have known that both boys and girls who are victims of bullying are at elevated risk for depression, including bullying online.

Now, a new study suggests that bullying-related depression among adolescent girls may lead to substance use.

As schools reopen following the holidays, the message to parents of adolescent girls is that bullying can have serious consequences,  according to researcher Jeremy Luk of the University of Washington.

“If your daughter is a victim of bullying, take it seriously, do all possible to prevent recurrence, and attend to possible depression and substance use,” he said. 

“For parents of boys who are bullied: Depression is still an issue, but it may not explain the relation between victimization and substance use.”

Luk, a doctoral student in child clinical psychology, reported his findings in the December issue of the journal Prevention Science.

His study is the first to identify depression as a possible link to the relation between victimization and substance use among adolescents. The findings are generalizable because they are based on data from a nationally representative sample of 1,495 tenth graders.

Luk’s research was based on data on bullying from the 2005/2006 U.S. Health Behavior in School-aged Children (HBSC).

“Bullying is a serious problem among adolescents. Previous research has shown that it is associated with loneliness, depression and suicide. But no previous national studies have identified depression as an explanation for the relationship between victimization from bullying and substance use,” Luk said.

The survey measured depression by asking 10th graders: how often in the past 30 days they: (1) were very sad; (2) were grouchy or irritable, or in a bad mood; (3) felt hopeless about the future; (4) felt like not eating or eating more than usual; (5) slept a lot more or a lot less than usual; and (6) had difficulty concentrating on their school work.

Responses were coded one to five: “never,” “seldom,” “sometimes,” “often,” and “always.” Substance use was measured by asking number of occasions in the past 30 days that adolescents had (1) smoked cigarettes; (2) drunk alcohol; (3) been drunk and (4) used marijuana.

For each item, four categories were created: “never,” “once or twice,” “three to five times” and “more than five times.”


Suffolk County anti-bullying legislation would make schools accountable


Suffolk County State Legislative Majority Leader Jon Cooper (D-Lloyd Harbor) recently introduced two resolutions designed to combat the bullying and cyber-bullying of school children. A third resolution targets cyber-stalking of adults.

New York is one of seven states that does not have any anti-bullying statutes in place, although several bills are currently pending in the state senate and assembly. Whether or not anything will come of any of the proposals is anybody’s guess: anti-bullying legislation has been bandied about in New York’s legislature since 2000, reports the national watchdog group Bully Police, but nothing has yet emerged out of committee. For not passing any anti-bullying legislation, Bully Police gave New York an “F,” its lowest possible grade.

The impetus
Cooper’s impetus for introducing the resolutions was the result of a meeting he held several weeks ago with Annie and Ronald Isaacs and their daughter, Jamie, of Lake Grove. “This 14-year-old girl and her parents recounted relentless bullying the girl had experienced over a six-year period,” said Cooper. “According to the parents, there was physical and verbal harassment and vandalism, all which remained unchecked in spite of numerous meetings with school officials.“

Cooper heard similar stories of bullying and school administrators refusing to take action, although, he noted, many districts do have zero tolerance policies regarding bullying.

Onus is on the schools
Suffolk’s anti-bully legislation would make school officials, such as principals, accountable for repeated incidents of bullying on school grounds. Failure to investigate allegations or discipline students engaged in bullying behavior could subject school administrators to a civil fine of $1,000.00 for each violation.

The resolution defines bullying behavior as “any physical, verbal or psychological attacks or intimidation directed against a student who cannot properly defend him- or her- self, including but not limited to assaulting; tripping; shoving; threatening; intimidating; spreading rumors about another; isolating another; humiliating; demands for money; blackmailing; destruction of another’s property; theft of another’s valued possessions; destruction of another’s work; and name-calling.”

Stopping cyber-bullying
A second proposal makes it unlawful for anyone to “engage in cyber-bullying against a minor” in Suffolk County, with violators subject to a misdemeanor charge punishable by a fine of up to $1,000 and/or a year in jail.

The resolution defines cyber-bullying as “engaging in a course of conduct or repeatedly committing acts of abusive behavior over a period of time, with the intent to coerce, intimidate, harass or cause substantial emotional distress to a person, and which serve no legitimate purpose, by communicating or causing a communication to be sent by mechanical or electronic means, posting statements on the internet or through a computer network.”

According to Linda Guido, Cooper’s legislative aide, the earliest this will be voted on is June 22, 2010. For more information on the resolutions, contact Jon Cooper’s office at 631-854-4500.


Inside the bullied brain

The alarming neuroscience of taunting

By Emily Anthes

In the wake of several tragedies that have made bullying a high-profile issue, it’s becoming clear that harassment by one’s peers is something more than just a rite of passage. Bullied kids are more likely to be depressed, anxious, and suicidal. They struggle in school — when they decide to show up at all. They are more likely to carry weapons, get in fights, and use drugs.

But when it comes to the actual harm bullying does, the picture grows murkier. The psychological torment that victims feel is real. But perhaps because many of us have experienced this sort of schoolyard cruelty and lived to tell the tale, peer harassment is still commonly written off as a “soft” form of abuse — one that leaves no obvious injuries and that most victims simply get over. It’s easy to imagine that, painful as bullying can be, all it hurts is our feelings.

A new wave of research into bullying’s effects, however, is now suggesting something more than that — that in fact, bullying can leave an indelible imprint on a teen’s brain at a time when it is still growing and developing. Being ostracized by one’s peers, it seems, can throw adolescent hormones even further out of whack, lead to reduced connectivity in the brain, and even sabotage the growth of new neurons.

These neurological scars, it turns out, closely resemble those borne by children who are physically and sexually abused in early childhood. Neuroscientists now know that the human brain continues to grow and change long after the first few years of life. By revealing the internal physiological damage that bullying can do, researchers are recasting it not as merely an unfortunate rite of passage but as a serious form of childhood trauma.

This change in perspective could have all sorts of ripple effects for parents, kids, and schools; it offers a new way to think about the pain suffered by ostracized kids, and could spur new antibullying policies. It offers the prospect that peer harassment, much like abuse and other traumatic experiences, may increasingly be seen as a medical problem — one that can be measured with brain scans, and which may yield to new kinds of clinical treatment.

During the first half of the 20th century, even severe child abuse was considered a largely psychological problem in its long-term effects, denting children emotionally in a way that made it hard for them to grow into happy adults.

Gradually, however, scientists began to look at the brains of adults who had been abused as children and realize that the damage wasn’t just emotional: Their brains had undergone telltale long-term changes. Over the past two decades, neuroscientists have marshaled plenty of evidence that serious physical and sexual abuse during early childhood can short-circuit normal brain development.

But what about cruelty that is emotional rather than physical? That that comes from peers instead of parents? And happens at school instead of at home, when children’s brains are no longer so young and malleable? In other words, what about bullying?

Martin Teicher, a neuroscientist at McLean Hospital in Belmont, has been examining just these kinds of scenarios. He began by studying the effects of being verbally abused by a parent. In his study of more than 1,000 young adults, Teicher found that verbal abuse could be as damaging to psychological functioning as the physical kind — that words were as hurtful as the famous sticks and stones. The finding sparked a new idea: “We decided to look at peer victimization,” he said.

So Teicher and his colleagues went back to their young adult subjects, focusing on those they had assumed were healthy in this respect — who’d had no history of abuse from their parents. The subjects, however, varied in how much verbal harassment — such as teasing, ridicule, criticism, screaming, and swearing — they had received from their peers.

What the scientists found was that kids who had been bullied reported more symptoms of depression, anxiety, and other psychiatric disorders than the kids who hadn’t. In fact, emotional abuse from peers turned out to be as damaging to mental health as emotional abuse from parents. “It’s a substantial early stressor,” Teicher said. The data were published in July in the American Journal of Psychiatry.

Things got even more interesting when Teicher decided to scan the brains of 63 of his young adult subjects. Those who reported having been mistreated by their peers had observable abnormalities in a part of the brain known as the corpus callosum — a thick bundle of fibers that connects the right and left hemispheres of the brain, and which is vital in visual processing, memory, and more. The neurons in their corpus callosums had less myelin, a coating that speeds communication between the cells — vital in an organ like the brain where milliseconds matter.

It’s not yet entirely clear what these changes in the corpus callosum may lead to, or whether they’re connected to the higher rates of depression that Teicher found in bullied kids. “There may be some subtle neurocognitive difficulties,” he said. “We’re currently doing research that will allow us to answer this question better.”

Teicher’s study is just one of a number of recent studies that have been finding troubling physical effects of even verbal bullying. For the past several years, Tracy Vaillancourt, a psychologist at the University of Ottawa, has been following a group of 12-year-olds, including some who had a history of being victimized by their peers, and assessing their functioning every six months. Among other things, she has discovered that being tormented by other kids can recalibrate children’s levels of cortisol, a hormone pumped out by the body during times of stress.

In a 2008 paper published in the journal Aggressive Behavior, Vaillancourt demonstrated that boys who are occasionally bullied have higher levels of cortisol than their peers. Bullied girls, meanwhile, seem to have abnormally low levels of the hormone. (It’s not entirely clear why that’s the case, but low cortisol levels are sometimes a sign of a body that has been so chronically stressed that it has learned to make less of the hormone.)

Vaillancourt speculates that cortisol may, in fact, underlie many of the adverse effects of bullying: It can weaken the functioning of the immune system, and at high levels can damage and even kill neurons in the hippocampus, potentially leading to memory problems that could make academics more difficult. Indeed, Vaillancourt has already found that teens who are bullied perform worse on tests of verbal memory than their peers. One of her next studies involves trying to get at this question directly: She will be putting some of her subjects — now ages 16 and 17 — into an MRI machine to look for evidence of damage to the hippocampus.

esearch on animals suggests that Vaillancourt might be onto something. To model the kind of psychosocial stress that accompanies bullying, Daniel A. Peterson, a neuroscientist at the Chicago Medical School, did a series of experiments in which he put a young, subordinate rat in a cage belonging to a much larger, older, more aggressive rat. The dominant rat — the king of this particular playground — promptly began to push the smaller one around. “We let it go to the point where there’s substantial physical contact, maybe a bite or two,” Peterson said. Then, the researchers would rescue the younger rat, removing him from the cage before he could be seriously injured.

As Peterson documented in a 2007 paper in the Journal of Neuroscience, just a single session of this kind of bullying was enough to leave a mark on the smaller rat’s brain. In particular, Peterson and his colleagues examined the rate of neurogenesis, or the birth of new brain cells, in that same all-important memory-maker: the hippocampus. The bullied rats still made new neurons at a normal rate, but there was a significant hiccup in the process — an unusually high percentage of the cells would die off before becoming fully mature.

It’s not yet clear how long these changes last. Peterson suspects that neuron survival returns to normal if the bullying is a single, isolated incident, as it was with his rats. But, he says, “I think if you had a more persistent stressor of this level, it could reset the thermostat so you’d have a lower level of neurogenesis going on.”

Research into the neurological effects of bullying is still preliminary, and animal models are not perfect replicas of human social behavior. But together, these early findings suggest that bullying, even the verbal kind, is more similar to physical and sexual abuse than we might like to admit. No longer can we draw a clear line between the two kinds of mistreatment — they can both produce the same kind of trauma.

There is still much that neuroscientists need to sort out, however. It remains difficult to thoroughly disentangle cause and effect: It’s possible, for instance, that kids with certain hormonal levels or brain characteristics are more likely, for whatever reason, to be bullied in the first place. And, encouragingly, changes in the brain don’t always translate into long-term damage: Indeed, some of the subjects who had what researchers suspect are bullying-related brain changes are now happy, healthy adults.

But the findings are certainly provocative, and they raise some serious questions about how we should think about bullying. Does being victimized have subtle effects on cognitive functioning that we haven’t even noticed yet? Might some kids be more likely to develop the neurological hallmarks of bullying? Now that we know that victims are undergoing profound physiological changes, are there medical interventions that would be as helpful, or more so, than counseling and therapy? Would demonstrating that bullying scars the brain make it easier to prosecute bullies in court?

Vaillancourt, for her part, sees another kind of value to the new neurobiological research: as a tool to change how bullying is seen by the public, as well as by educators who may be in a position to intervene. In the past, Vaillancourt has been frustrated that her studies on the emotional and psychological effects of bullying have not generated much attention. “When I show that something is biological, it makes headlines,” she said. “For some reason I think humans are more compelled to believe biological evidence than someone saying, ‘Oh I’m depressed. I don’t feel good about this.’ I’m hoping that that is a policy changer.”


Bullying isn’t just a normal rite of passage

By Kay Hocker

Teasing and taunting. “Four eyes!” “Thunder thighs!” “Fag!” Games of keep-away with your shoes. Shoving and tripping.

How many of us make it through school without a legacy of war stories to tell our grandchildren?

Bullying often seems to be an inevitable trial of growing up, like chicken pox or acne. If we just endure it, someday we’ll graduate to adulthood and it will all go away. In the meantime, toughen up. Dealing with graffiti on your locker will build character and teach you to overcome hardship.

But is bullying really inevitable? Should we accept it as a normal part of childhood? Should we look for the silver lining and tell our kids that the schoolyard scuffles make them stronger and train them to deal with conflict?

The Diversity Council’s reply is an emphatic “No.” Bullying is unequivocally unacceptable, and it’s the responsibility of every one of us to create a culture that makes that clear to our children.

Half of all children experience bullying at some point, and one in ten is bullied regularly. And the problem is growing as cyberbullying opens new frontiers. More than half of all teens admit to online bullying.

Cyberspace makes it all so much easier. Taunts can reach a much bigger audience, much faster. The bully is able to remain anonymous and do the cruel deeds in private. Bullies are also screened from the consequences of cruelty, unable to see the immediate pain in the victim’s face that might otherwise inhibit them.

As for making our kids stronger, research demonstrates the opposite. Children who have been bullied experience higher rates of sleeping difficulties, depression, headaches, stomach pains, and low self-esteem.

Academically, children pay a price too. The National Education Association estimates that 160,000 students miss school every day out of fear of bullying. A Rochester fourth-grader wrote about the problem of teasing at school: “People discriminate against people about their size and a lot more. I know it hurts me, it affects my grades, and I can’t think straight.”

Another student explained, “It feels like your locked in a cage, and the more teasing, the cage gets smaller and smaller.”

The perpetrators are not immune from the effects either. Bullies are at higher risk for depression, substance abuse, delinquency, and psychological problems.

And sadly, these consequences are only the beginning. Studies show that victims of bullies are between 2 and 9 times more likely to consider or attempt suicide. Participating in the act of bullying has also been linked to higher rates of suicidal thoughts and behaviors.

The tragic side of bullying was brought home to Minnesotans in July of this year when Jason Aaberg, a 15-year-old student from the Anoka-Hennepin County School District, hanged himself in his bedroom. He had been systematically harassed at school for his sexual orientation.

“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” Nonsense. Too often, bullying kills.

Can we stop bullying? Should we bother trying, or is it hardwired into children’s brains?

Research shows that anti-bullying programs make a difference. The Scandinavian countries, which began using widespread anti-bullying curricula in the 1970s and ’80s, now have some of the lowest bullying rates in the world.

The Rochester school district has a comprehensive anti-bullying policy, aimed at those who condone or support the actions of the bully, as well as at the aggressors.

The Diversity Council also partners with the school district to offer our Spark! program to K-12 students once a year. Spark! teaches kids to recognize and stand up to prejudice of all kinds, whether it’s based on weight, disability, sexual orientation, ethnicity, or anything else. Our 4th- and 7th-grade lessons focus specifically on the problems of teasing and bullying.

But once a year is not enough. To make a deep impact, research shows that anti-bullying messages must be consistent and widespread. We must establish a culture that does not tolerate bullying, a culture that encourages children to report bullying without being brushed off as ‘tattletales,’ a culture that takes bullying seriously and encourages adults to actively intervene.

Schools, parents and the community at large all have a role to play in creating that culture.

Children take their cues from adults around them. Appearance is the most common reason for bullying, with four in 10 teens reporting seeing students harassed for the way they look. What messages are we sending to our kids about the importance of appearance?

Children also absorb prejudices from the adults they respect. What do the children around us hear us saying about immigrants, or Muslims, or Republicans? Are we sending them a message that hostility and cutting criticism are OK?

It’s up to every one of us to make sure that we’re creating a culture of respect for our children. If we want to change what’s happening in our schools, the change must begin in us. Bullying can be stopped, but it will take all of us working together to make it happen.

Kay Hocker is executive director of Rochester’s Diversity Council.


Can Schools Teach Empathy?

Why programs aiming to prevent bullying and help kids learn compassion may be fighting an uphill battle.

In a Canadian second-grade classroom, a group of bright-faced 7-year-olds ponder how Hudson, a 4-month-old baby, might be feeling in this new, possibly intimidating environment. “Shy?” one child asks as Hudson works industriously on his pacifier. “Scared?” another child offers. In another classroom, when a giddy baby waves a toy and then drops it, a small student scoots forward to offer it back. Students in another class giggle as they watch a baby drool on a large plastic doll. “He’s giving him a bath!” a child squeals.

These interactions, captured on video, will melt even the coldest hearts—which is exactly the point. They’re examples of Roots of Empathy, a Canadian program now in 47 schools in the Seattle area, brainchild of educator and writer Mary Gordon. Roots of Empathy seeks to reduce aggression, violence, and bullying in schools by teaching children to see the world from another’s perspective—in this case, the perspective of a baby—and in the process teach children empathy, compassion, and a few parenting skills to boot.

It’s a program that’s offering educators a ray of hope after a grim year. A spate of teen suicides triggered by antigay bullying has spurred a kind of national soul searching: Is high school getting nastier? Is it even possible to teach kids to be kinder people? “Teaching kindness is related to ‘social and emotional learning,’ ” says Barbara Gueldner, a psychologist who worked on a University of Oregon study that evaluated anti-bullying curricula, in an email. Gueldner is optimistic that kids can learn both to manage their emotions and to be kinder to others.

These “emotional literacy” programs, with names like Caring School Community, I Can Problem Solve, Promoting Alternative Thinking Strategies, and Strong Kids, typically start with “emotional identification,” or understanding feelings and naming them. Young children, usually 4- to 8-year-olds, learn to recognize physiological cues, such as “when you feel afraid, your heart beats faster and you might feel uncomfortable,” says Gueldner. “When kids are older, the concept is more sophisticated. Kids learn that there are thoughts that go along with their feelings.”

The next step is learning that other people have these feelings, too—the “perspective taking” of the Roots program; in the Strong Kids program, students discuss common social scenarios and brainstorm possible feelings people might be experiencing. And finally, the social piece of the puzzle comes into play, says Gueldner: “Kindness is an action, and generally motivated by the feeling of sympathy and, hopefully, empathy. For example, you might feel afraid if someone bullied you, and when you think a classmate feels afraid, you may say something (a kind word) or come to her defense.”

In fact, a primary component of anti-bullying curricula encourages the “bystanders”—the kids who aren’t bullies or victims, but rather passive onlookers or even cheerleaders—to either step in or report bullying incidents. It’s a common effective tactic in prevention programs to consider the school as an ecosystem of sorts, with every person—from cafeteria workers and bus drivers to parents and students—playing a role. “You treat everybody; you really try to change the system,” says Malcolm Watson, a professor at Brandeis who studies aggression and violence in adolescents. But even when bullying decreases, it’s hard to know whether kids are actually becoming “kinder”—kindness being hard to measure—or simply refraining from beating one another up in the hallways.

At the moment, “school districts can choose from dozens of programs [to ameliorate bullying],” says Scott W. Ross, a Utah State University professor who, along with Gueldner and another colleague, conducted Oregon’s 24-year meta-analysis of 16 anti-bullying curricula, “all with different philosophies.” But aggression, like kindness, doesn’t come in countable units, so it’s tough to determine effectiveness. In fact, some schools report an increase in bullying after programs begin, as teachers and students become more aware of negative incidents. “So it’s hard to say this or that program really works to stop bullying,” says Ross.

Though the schools that report a negative effect were the exception, the Oregon study showed only a modest positive benefit to many programs. A similar study at Cambridge of 59 anti-bullying programs, which showed a decrease in bullying incidents of 17 to 23 percent, managed to identify some common effective strategies: videos that demonstrated various scenarios and what to do; increased supervision of bullying “hotspots,” like playgrounds; and parent training. “Each of the programs has some merit,” says Shelley Hymel, a professor at the University of British Columbia who studies bullying and peer harassment in schools, “but we still don’t know which are the best techniques. Approaches that work in one place don’t necessarily work in another.”

The parent training may be the most critical piece of the puzzle. Gueldner, who now works in a pediatric practice, points out that we’re living in difficult times: “A lot of kids don’t have their basic needs met,” she says, “and that’s inherently stressful. When you don’t feel that great, you’re not that nice to other people.” But even kids who are adequately fed and clothed may be observing—and imitating—parents who go through life with their brass knuckles on. If adults are teaching their kids that life is a zero-sum game (witness, in her reality show, Sarah Palin’s crowing to her daughter about “one-upping” the neighbor), children are going to treat their classmates as competitors rather than colleagues.

“We definitely don’t live in a collective society—and this speaks to [parental] modeling,” says Gueldner. In the pediatric clinic, she teaches emotional literacy to adults as part of parent training: “First, you have to be aware of your own behavior and what you’re modeling to your kids. This requires a certain amount of self-reflection—you have to care about what your behavior says about you. We talk about individual, family, and cultural values, feelings, and simple ways to validate their children’s emotional experience.” And then you have to be aware of what’s going on in social situations, and talk about it. “You might say, ‘This is what I saw happening. What did you see? What would you want someone to do if you were in that situation?’ ”

Parents and educators hope that this sort of multipronged effort will reduce aggression and bullying and produce happier and more academically successful kids. Bullied children don’t want to go to school, and they’re anxious when they get there, so transforming schools into safe spaces has a direct impact on academic performance. “Children’s ability to demonstrate social, emotional, and academic skills are intertwined and … essential for overall health and success,” says Gueldner.

So as schools cast about to find the perfect, silver-bullet curriculum, Roots of Empathy offers a beacon of hope. Kimberly Schonert-Reichl, a professor in the department of educational and counseling psychology at the University of British Columbia, compared Roots students with a control group and found that those who had received the intervention reported an 88 percent drop in “proactive” bullying incidents (the sort of coldblooded targeting of a child by a bully) as well as a significant drop in “relational” bullying (backstabbing and gossiping, for example). She measured “bullying incidents” by distributing surveys to both the students and the teachers and found the answers to be remarkably consistent. Schonert-Reichl has been able to replicate these findings in three more studies in Canada as well as on the Isle of Man.

These are the sorts of numbers that could have educators scrambling to get a fresh crop of babies into American classrooms. However, the program hasn’t been tested on kids older than grade 8, primarily due to the complicated logistics of keeping high-school students in one class for as long as an entire school year. It’s also possible that learning compassion, like learning the cello or French, is easier for younger children. “It’s a tougher sell to teach adolescents than kids of a younger age,” says Watson. The Cambridge study, however, determined that anti-bullying programs actually work better on kids 11 and older—perhaps because adolescents generally enter a new stage of, in psych parlance, “moral development.” Considering this conflicting information, Hymel said in an email, “Different programs reach different kids in different ways … It would be great to have a series of initiatives across ages, all of which lead kids to the same positive outcomes.”

The federal government thinks it’s worth a try: in August the Department of Health and Human Services expanded its national anti-bullying campaign, Stop Bullying Now!, to target 5- to 8-year-olds, and in October the Department of Education distributed $38.8 million in grants to 11 states for a Safe and Supportive Schools initiative. Early next year, the Department of Ed will have workshops to “help educators better understand their obligations and the resources available to take prompt and effective steps that will end harassment and bullying in schools and on college campuses,” says a press release.

All this discussion, though, raises a question: what’s wrong with American high schools—or American families—that kids are this cruel to each other in the first place? “We have to look at the whole notion of high school,” says Schonert-Reichl, a former high-school teacher herself. “Is our current model of high school developmentally appropriate? You create this massive institution with 3,000 students that seems prisonlike—how could you not have bullying occur?”

1 Comment more...

Snider: Where are parents when kids are being bullied?

I think it’s fair to say that we all knew bullies when we were in school. There was always that one kid who seemed to feel the need to hurt, intimidate or simply humiliate the other children. Of course, it wasn’t always an individual who bullied; there were also groups. I think teenage girls are the worst. I’d rather take a good beating from a male bully any day before I’d want to be the odd girl out from a group of teenage girls. I think that just about every kid in school would benefit from reading “Lord of the Flies.” The book is about a group of boys who get stranded on an island and over time they develop a “wolf pack” mentality. Without adults to oversee the kids and govern them, basically the weaker kids get sectioned out and eventually chaos breaks out and well, you can just imagine.

What exactly makes a bully? According to my Yahoo search, there are five indicators of a bully in the making: aggressive behavior, enjoyment from pushing other children around, dominating or manipulating, a smooth talker and someone who gets easily frustrated.

When I was growing up, there wasn’t such a thing as cyber-bullying. If you wanted to bully someone, you actually had to get up from a chair and go through the motions. Evidently now it’s possible to push someone around with a mouse and keyboard. I don’t understand the whole concept because I can’t help but wonder where the parents are while this is going on? Even with conventional schoolyard bullying, sooner or later the bully’s parents are told of the bad behavior. Once again, to me, it goes back to the parent, and my question remains: Why aren’t the parents being held accountable?

There are a lot of parents who don’t agree with corporal punishment in schools (remember the paddle?). They think it’s a violation of their parental rights, inhumane or not proper to punish someone else’s kids. My thought is this: If a kid is out of control, a disruption to the learning process, mean to other kids or a physical threat to one of the other kids, then he/she needs to stay at home so the learning environment for the other kids is left intact. It’s not the schools’ responsibility to raise children. It’s the schools’ responsibility to teach them.

If the school isn’t given the authority to punish unruly students and the parents obviously aren’t taking care of business at home, then it isn’t fair to the kids who are at school to learn. According to Bullypolice.org, Missouri is the 45th state to pass anti-bullying legislation. HB1543 is easy to read and basically states that every district had to adopt an anti-bullying policy by Sept. 1, 2007. It goes on to describe bullying as intimidation or harassment that causes a student to fear for his or her safety. It also states that the schools’ staff is to be responsible for reporting any bullying that they are witness to. I suppose it’s good to have law and policy to help prevent bullying. I just don’t agree with 100 percent of the burden being placed on the school systems. Parents should step up and raise their own kids instead of relying on the school to do it. That’s my thought.

Joe Snider is a Navy veteran and writes “A Local Voice” every other Monday. He can be contacted at Joe.snider@att.net.


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